The family ties of Secura have long puzzled Templar of the Darkness, so he started a thread on the Secura board, to sort things out. This intrepid reporter took it upon himself to create a family tree, using genealogy software to connect the persons. I’m pretty sure it will come as a surprise to Templar to learn that he doesn’t have 2 brothers, but 17 (that I have found this far). That said, they may not all have the same parents, so it may be a case of half brothers’ half’ brothers, so the relation may still be pretty distant.
Be that as it may, that isn’t really so disturbing. I find it more disturbing when some children have two or three sets of parents, but I suppose we can explain that through multiple adoptions. Still, it creates some problems as my program is real bad at handling several sets of parents. Several spouses and several set of children are ok, but alas, not several sets of parents. It also has a problem with all the gay marriages around, demanding that there should be one person of each gender in a marriage, not to mention gay marriages with children and even worse; triple gay marriages (children or no children).
The thread is now on it’s third page. If all the other have only half as big families, it still means that more than 900 characters are accounted for on Secura alone, just after these few posts. Statistically that would mean that all of Secura is related, apart from a few loners. Now I know for a fact that some characters have relatives on other worlds as well and there is no reason to assume things are any different there. From that, we may deduce that more than 95% of all Tibians are related in some way. I guess the old song is right then: “Treat him well, he is your brother. You might need it self one day.”
Actually, with the amount of reproduction taking place, I am surprised that anyone finds the time to hunt, but many family members seem to have gained high level as well as big families. Yet family ties may be even more complex than the examples above. One high profiled, big mouthed counsellor has messed things up even worse. For the sake of privacy, he/she shall remain anonymous and I will only refer to him/her as Waylan P. or W. Pestivar. Now, Waylan P. is the mother of a beautiful daughter, with whom he claims to have a love child it took three minutes to produce. Be that as it may, he also has had at least three husbands (that he can remember, probably more), the last of which in a gay marriage and owes alimony to his (or is that her?) ex-wife. He presently has an illegitimate fiancé, to make things even more complicated for a genealogist.
After processing the 2 first posts, their character pages and the pages of their named relatives and the pages of those they in turn named etc, I was up to more than 70 persons in the family tree. At this point, the program decided it had had enough of these twisted relations and quit on me. They say real men don’t make back-ups, and I must real macho, as I hadn’t pressed the save button for the past three hours… So now I will look for another program, one that handles triple-gay-double-sexchanges-and-multiple-adoption issues and if I find one and actually manage to map out the family ties, you’ll find the tree here on Tibianews.
